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Put A Pause On That Appreciation

August 17, 2018

Having just wrapped session one of this year’s Fellowship Training Group, I had a full heart. I was feeling pretty appreciative of this stalwart group of practitioners and how hard they worked. Walking into the kitchen, I saw this.

I started to tell David just how grateful I am. He held up a spoon and said, “hold your gratitude.”

David, in addition to being a wicked funny husband extraordinaire and scholar, he is a Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction instructor. Dude knows how to savor a moment.

Hold your gratitude.
Put a pause on that appreciation.

I did. I paused. He tended to the rice he was using in our supper — that HE was cooking. Giving himself to the moment, his experience and needs in the present without hesitation, without apology.

Put a pause on that appreciation.

He put down the spoon, turned to me and received my hug and appreciation. He let himself RECEIVE my appreciation and gave me the chance to EXPRESS it. No rush. No hurry. No one to satisfy or please. Just two people sharing the sweet balm of appreciation.

It’s so natural for us to rush past such moments with the fog of inattention. Just taking the time to look into someone’s eyes with the exchange of appreciation is not the norm.

How often do our clients leave our offices saying “thank you” and we aren’t looking at them or brush them off — “you did the work.”

Yes AND. Receiving gratitude completes the circle. Appreciation feels so satisfying with a pause.

What’s been your experience with giving and receiving appreciation? It’s deeply uncomfortable for some people, but when we withdraw from accepting it, receiving it, we leave the other person hanging.

INTEGRATION TIPS: 
Enough of you know a bit about how to create an integration. I thought I might make some suggestions with posts like this. Would y’all like that?

Expressing appreciation / Receiving appreciation
Pausing / Rushing

Let us know your wins, insights and challenges with these integrations.

Melanie McGhee Comment
AppreciationGratitudeRelationships

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